Tuesday, January 18, 2011

The Name Game

When Mr. Awesome and I decided to start our family, we put a lot of thought into what we were going to name our children. In fact, before I met Mr. Awesome I had a mental list of names I liked, most of which he nixed immediately. I did win the battle with Dude's first name and we compromised with his middle name but when it came to naming Crafty things became complicated very quickly.

We settled on a boy's name fairly early on in my pregnancy but when it came to choosing a girl's name, I couldn't make up my mind. Mr. Awesome scoffed at the name I loved but offered no suggestion of his own. The closer we came to my due date the more frantic I felt; I knew I was carrying a girl, I just knew it and nothing sounded right for her.

Finally, a couple of weeks before my due date, we decided on a name. I was thrilled! We had a name that was feminine yet strong. It was unique without being weird...it was perfect! That is, it was perfect until Crafty was born. I took one look at the kid and knew we had chosen the wrong name.

When the nurse brought her to me and asked, "What are you going to name this little princess?" Mr. Awesome was shocked when I said her name was going to be 'Crafty' because, although Crafty was a name we had discussed, we had agreed on something entirely different. But, instead of starting an argument with the woman who just laboured for 8 hours and gave birth to his nine and a half pound baby sans drugs, the smart man just went with it.

Fast forward 8 years, Crafty hates her name and Mr. Awesome is taking her side.

For five months she has been on a campaign to change her name. It's something she has been asking for on and off over the last two years but within the last four months or so her pleading has become relentless. This weekend we finally sat down with her and had a serious conversation about her name.

Before we moved, although her name was still fairly common, she was the only Crafty in her class, now she is in a class with another Crafty, making our Crafty, Crafty F. - a less than desirable handle in the third grade, I guess. She stated her case very well and heard our side of the argument. At the end of the discussion we said that a total name change was not something we were willing to do but we would consider allowing her to go, especially at school, by her middle name. We told her to talk to her friends about it, get their feedback and we'll think about it some more, too. We have scheduled another conversation (she made us put it on the calendar!) for the beginning of February.

Now I only have a couple of weeks to decide if making her live with her name, as is, will scar her for life and send her into counselling as an adult or if allowing her to change her name will make her the flaky, weird kid in town and will, eventually, send her into counselling as an adult. Either way, it's bound to be all my fault.

1 comment:

Cat Connor said...

I have a feeling Crafty is no where near as bad a name as Squealer. As yet Squealer has not complained about her quite unique name (surprisingly Squealer is not her real name). We have found another one - in Ireland. But not here in New Zealand. And VERY VERY few people can look at her beautiful 11 lettered name and say it. Unless of course they're Irish. :)
But - she has her name constantly screwed up (teachers have to LEARN to spell it and say it too) - she loves being the only one. We've had to play up that point a few times over the years.

:) It's good to be different, (at least she's not called Apple.)

Good luck with Crafty.