Spring Break Day 4 and our plans for today had to be cancelled due to illness. Some friends from our old neighborhood were supposed to come out for a visit today but one of their sons is sick. The kids were pretty bummed out yesterday when they heard the news but today they are handling the change in plans like champions, they have made their own plans for today and their having a great time.
When I got up this morning it was to the sounds of the kids laughing and playing Playdough together. They were singing songs from their favourite movies, imagining that they were cooks at a restaurant and good naturedly teasing each other. They played like that for almost two hours and then they moved on to the next items on their lists.
Yes, they made a list of things they were going to do today. The list included a bubble bath for Crafty while the boys played Wii, then a game of Elephun followed by lunch, playing outside then a movie complete with popcorn and sour gummies. After supper they plan to have a Jedi battle while Crafty plays with her dolls for a while, then they are going to play Playmobile and read a couple of stories before bed.
Sounds like a full day and so far they have stuck to their plan without arguing. I can't remember the last time my kids have spent so much time together without having major arguments constantly. Sure we have had moments of chaos and rowdiness this week but for the most part we have been experiencing sibling bliss.
They have been helpful, respectful and generally a lot of fun to be with. I'm not sure what's going on, maybe its just that they're getting older or maybe that here, in this house, there is enough space for everyone to do their own thing but whatever it is I love it! I love having relaxed conversations with the kids, playing games and joking around with them. I also love that they are at the stage where I don't need to be activity director 24-7. They can make up their own minds on how to spend their day and for the most part they make pretty good decisions.
After they had cleaned up the Playdough (complete with wiping the table and sweeping the floor) the boys went downstairs to play Wii and Crafty sat with me on my bed while we waited for the tub to fill for her bubble bath. I asked her if she was missing school and her friends and she said not really.
"Not even your friends?"
"Nope, I'm kind of having fun with he boys."
"Really? You don't wish that you had more play dates this week?"
"Having more girls around would be fun," she said, "but me and the boys just fit together, we're a team, kind of."
"You guys certainly seem like you're having fun together," I said.
"We are," she said as she slid off the bed and walked toward the door, "at least when they are not being dufusses."
Yep, peas and carrots ... different but still good together.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
The Nothing Day
Spring Break Day 3 and the kids and I have decided that today is going to be a nothing day ... we are going to do absolutely nothing today. This means no chores, no getting dressed (if you don't want to), no running errands and no homework. Just a great big day of nothing.
My nothing day began with a 2am wake up call from Crafty because she couldn't remember if I tucked her in before I went to bed or not (Mr. Awesome tucked her in and he was asleep 30 seconds later). At 7:30 Dude came into y room to remind me that it was Nothing Day and I should sleep in if I want. At 7:44, Dude returned to tell me he thought my bedroom was too cold for me to seep in and I should shut the window. At 7:58 Dude came back once again and insisted on closing my bedroom window.
By 8:30 each kid had visited my room one more time to get me to open a box of cereal, to ask if they should feed the tortoise and to inform me that they are out of clean underwear. It is now 11am and have done three loads of laundry, cleaned the kitchen, painted Crafty's toenails, fixed Mischief's Playmobile fire station, vacuumed the basement, cleaned the kitchen again (after second breakfast) and cleaned the kids' bathroom.
When I sat down to check my emails and write this blog Dude came up behind me and gave me a huge hug and said, "Don't you love nothing days?"
"Yeah, Buddy, nothing days rock," laughed as I thought about my busy morning.
"Can we go out and rent some movies, then stop at the grocery store to get some chocolate milk and if you want you can stop at Timportance and get a coffee too," he asked.
Errands, what happened to my nothing day?! "Yeah, sure we can ... just give me a couple of minutes."
"Great! I don't have any clean pants though, you're going to have to wash some."
"I just did three loads of laundry, there must be something clean you can wear?"
"I have all my pants in my room, I didn't want to crowd the laundry room for you. So can you wash them?"
"Yeah, Buddy, take them to the laundry room and I'll be right there."
"Thanks, Mom ... nothing days are awesome!"
Nothing Day? To quote one of my favourie movies, "I do not think that word means what you think it means!"
My nothing day began with a 2am wake up call from Crafty because she couldn't remember if I tucked her in before I went to bed or not (Mr. Awesome tucked her in and he was asleep 30 seconds later). At 7:30 Dude came into y room to remind me that it was Nothing Day and I should sleep in if I want. At 7:44, Dude returned to tell me he thought my bedroom was too cold for me to seep in and I should shut the window. At 7:58 Dude came back once again and insisted on closing my bedroom window.
By 8:30 each kid had visited my room one more time to get me to open a box of cereal, to ask if they should feed the tortoise and to inform me that they are out of clean underwear. It is now 11am and have done three loads of laundry, cleaned the kitchen, painted Crafty's toenails, fixed Mischief's Playmobile fire station, vacuumed the basement, cleaned the kitchen again (after second breakfast) and cleaned the kids' bathroom.
When I sat down to check my emails and write this blog Dude came up behind me and gave me a huge hug and said, "Don't you love nothing days?"
"Yeah, Buddy, nothing days rock," laughed as I thought about my busy morning.
"Can we go out and rent some movies, then stop at the grocery store to get some chocolate milk and if you want you can stop at Timportance and get a coffee too," he asked.
Errands, what happened to my nothing day?! "Yeah, sure we can ... just give me a couple of minutes."
"Great! I don't have any clean pants though, you're going to have to wash some."
"I just did three loads of laundry, there must be something clean you can wear?"
"I have all my pants in my room, I didn't want to crowd the laundry room for you. So can you wash them?"
"Yeah, Buddy, take them to the laundry room and I'll be right there."
"Thanks, Mom ... nothing days are awesome!"
Nothing Day? To quote one of my favourie movies, "I do not think that word means what you think it means!"
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
A House Full of Dwarfs
So, it's day two of Spring Break and things are grooving here at this Random House (and of course as right this sentence I am interrupted five times to break up fights and answer the same question twice). We have some pals stopping by for a visit this afternoon and the Wee Ones are so stoked that they have spent much of the past 24 hours helping me to clean and organise the house.
For those of you who know me personally or have been reading this blog since the beginning you know that I am a recovering Domestically Challenged individual but what you may not know is that my control freak tendencies have caused me to swing in the other direction. I wouldn't go so far as to call myself a neat freak but I am pretty picky about how I clean and organise, so much so that Mr. Awesome and the Wee Ones rarely are allowed to help me clean.
I know it sounds crazy, a busy mom turning down help to clean, but I do ... all the time. I get a little mental when the middle of the room is vacuumed but not along the baseboards, or when the kitchen is cleaned except for wiping the table or when the pillows are left in a heap on the couch rather than being arranged properly. I have been mocked and chastised by friends who say they would be blown away with any offer o help from their family and I regularly turn help away. Shame on me?
So yesterday when I started to tidy up the house and Crafty offered to help I said okay. Then Dude wanted in on the cleaning action and Mischief followed along, mostly because he had no one left to play with. So we made a list of all the chores that had to be done and the kids each chose two zones to clean. I watched them scurry around sweeping, dusting and organising and tried to ignore the dust around the baseboards and the teetering stack of 'organised' books on the end table. At the end of the day they toured me around the house to proudly display all that they had accomplished.
"It's just like you have a house full of dwarfs!" Mischief declared.
"What?" I asked, searching for the link between clean house and little people.
"Y'know like Sleeping Snow, wait no, I mean the White girl ... Snow White and all those dwarf guys she made clean her house. You're just like her, Mom and her House Full of Dwarfs."
Not quite the stuff of fairy tales but I'll take it!
For those of you who know me personally or have been reading this blog since the beginning you know that I am a recovering Domestically Challenged individual but what you may not know is that my control freak tendencies have caused me to swing in the other direction. I wouldn't go so far as to call myself a neat freak but I am pretty picky about how I clean and organise, so much so that Mr. Awesome and the Wee Ones rarely are allowed to help me clean.
I know it sounds crazy, a busy mom turning down help to clean, but I do ... all the time. I get a little mental when the middle of the room is vacuumed but not along the baseboards, or when the kitchen is cleaned except for wiping the table or when the pillows are left in a heap on the couch rather than being arranged properly. I have been mocked and chastised by friends who say they would be blown away with any offer o help from their family and I regularly turn help away. Shame on me?
So yesterday when I started to tidy up the house and Crafty offered to help I said okay. Then Dude wanted in on the cleaning action and Mischief followed along, mostly because he had no one left to play with. So we made a list of all the chores that had to be done and the kids each chose two zones to clean. I watched them scurry around sweeping, dusting and organising and tried to ignore the dust around the baseboards and the teetering stack of 'organised' books on the end table. At the end of the day they toured me around the house to proudly display all that they had accomplished.
"It's just like you have a house full of dwarfs!" Mischief declared.
"What?" I asked, searching for the link between clean house and little people.
"Y'know like Sleeping Snow, wait no, I mean the White girl ... Snow White and all those dwarf guys she made clean her house. You're just like her, Mom and her House Full of Dwarfs."
Not quite the stuff of fairy tales but I'll take it!
Monday, March 28, 2011
The First Day of Spring Break
Yay?
In theory I look forward to the school break the kids get during the year. Thanksgiving is a nice time to take a breath, Remembrance Day is an excellent day to relax and Christmas Break is the perfect opportunity to unwind a bit. I go into each of these breaks full of optimism and plans for some really great family time but within the first couple of hours f each school break I start wishing that school would be called back into some kind of emergency session. This is never more true than during Spring Break.
I don't know what it is about this time of the year but the kids are nuts! Its probably cabin fever mixed with their general fed-up-edness with the snow but they are all rowdy, loud and full of good/bad ideas (depending which side of the resulting catastrophe you're standing on).
This year I am trying to combat the mayhem with a few well timed outings and visits with friends but if this morning is an indicator of what I'm in for this week my hopes for a more blissful break may have just flown out the window!
I didn't hear from the kids until about an hour after we usually get up for school. At first they were quiet, I could faintly ear them chatting with each other and making breakfast but that only lasted a few minutes. By quarter to nine a full on Jedi war was taking place on he main floor of the house. I could hear the light sabres, blaster guns and whirring of ships zipping up and down the hall. When the boys decided to capture Crafty, she was Princess Leia unbeknownst to her, she panicked and I got up to referee.
Apparently the battle was a human/Lego figure hybrid battle that involved stripping the living room couch of all its pillow, moving the kitchen benches to block off the doorways to the dining room and front entry and having the army of Lego figures take their stand in Dude's toast with peanut butter (apparently because it sticks better and it looks like a foreign planet). As I ventured deeper into the battle scape I found that the front closet was some kind of hideout with many of the shoes and coats used as a barricade and that 'Princess Leia' had been abducted from her craft area where she had been beading, gluing, taping, stamping, painting, colouring and glittering everything in sight.
As I write this I am waiting for the coffee to brew while Mischief is returning the living room and front entry to some kind of order, Dude is licking his Lego guys clean and tidying up the kitchen and Crafty is peacefully back at her project. We came to a compromise, battles are for the basement and you cannot take anyone hostage without their consent.
I'm going to pour myself a pot of coffee and barricade myself in my bedroom until morning ... Monday morning! Happy Spring Break!
In theory I look forward to the school break the kids get during the year. Thanksgiving is a nice time to take a breath, Remembrance Day is an excellent day to relax and Christmas Break is the perfect opportunity to unwind a bit. I go into each of these breaks full of optimism and plans for some really great family time but within the first couple of hours f each school break I start wishing that school would be called back into some kind of emergency session. This is never more true than during Spring Break.
I don't know what it is about this time of the year but the kids are nuts! Its probably cabin fever mixed with their general fed-up-edness with the snow but they are all rowdy, loud and full of good/bad ideas (depending which side of the resulting catastrophe you're standing on).
This year I am trying to combat the mayhem with a few well timed outings and visits with friends but if this morning is an indicator of what I'm in for this week my hopes for a more blissful break may have just flown out the window!
I didn't hear from the kids until about an hour after we usually get up for school. At first they were quiet, I could faintly ear them chatting with each other and making breakfast but that only lasted a few minutes. By quarter to nine a full on Jedi war was taking place on he main floor of the house. I could hear the light sabres, blaster guns and whirring of ships zipping up and down the hall. When the boys decided to capture Crafty, she was Princess Leia unbeknownst to her, she panicked and I got up to referee.
Apparently the battle was a human/Lego figure hybrid battle that involved stripping the living room couch of all its pillow, moving the kitchen benches to block off the doorways to the dining room and front entry and having the army of Lego figures take their stand in Dude's toast with peanut butter (apparently because it sticks better and it looks like a foreign planet). As I ventured deeper into the battle scape I found that the front closet was some kind of hideout with many of the shoes and coats used as a barricade and that 'Princess Leia' had been abducted from her craft area where she had been beading, gluing, taping, stamping, painting, colouring and glittering everything in sight.
As I write this I am waiting for the coffee to brew while Mischief is returning the living room and front entry to some kind of order, Dude is licking his Lego guys clean and tidying up the kitchen and Crafty is peacefully back at her project. We came to a compromise, battles are for the basement and you cannot take anyone hostage without their consent.
I'm going to pour myself a pot of coffee and barricade myself in my bedroom until morning ... Monday morning! Happy Spring Break!
Friday, March 25, 2011
The Gift of Appreciation
I am finally wrapping up Staff Appreciation at Dude's school for this year. After months of planning lunches and treats for coffee break and making thank-you cards and center pieces we are done. I dropped off the last of the coffee break snacks about half an hour ago .. I'm done!
People comment from time to time on how 'thankful' I am and how much effort I put into appreciation and to tell you the truth, I am not a naturally thankful person. I have worked very hard to notice people and the things they do. I practice being appreciative with Mr. Awesome and with the kids. I make a conscious effort to tell people that I see them and appreciate what they do.
I started this for two reasons. When I was in high school I started volunteering on a team at church. The team leader was one of my mom's friends, someone I had known for years. It wasn't until I started working with her on a weekly basis that I noticed how often she said thank you and even more than that, how much she showed her appreciation for her team by respecting their time, ideas and talents. I also noticed that the people on her team were willing to work harder, stay later and were generally happier than most other teams volunteering there. I started studying her, learning from how she interacted with people and even now, years later, I often asked myself, 'What would Becky do?' when I'm puzzled by an interpersonal dilemma.
The second reason for my practice of appreciation comes from a lesson hard learned. Several yeas ago my friend's mother became very ill. This friend and I weren't super close but we had attended school and youth group together for several years and I had known her parents as very active members of our church community. I was always impressed by how giving and accepting her parents were and how much they loved each other, they were real partners in everything. I learned a lot from observing them over the years and I had always felt very grateful that they were part of the village that raised me.
When Mrs. W's health began to deteriorate, I really wanted to visit her or write her a note or something to tell her how much I appreciated and admired the way she lived her life. I wanted her to know that she made a difference to me ... but I didn't. I didn't want to intrude or force my way into her family's last weeks with her so I didn't say anything and she passed. She lived a full and marvelous life and was treasured by many, many people and I know she knew that, I just wish I had told her what she meant to me.
From Becky and Mrs. W I learned that you can motivate people through being appreciative and part of living with no regrets is telling the impressive people in your life just how impressive they are, every chance you get. The other thing that I have discovered along the way is that being appreciative, genuinely thankful for those people who make your life spectacular, is a gift to yourself. Noticing the good things in your life is like turning on the sunshine, everything is brighter and lighter and sweeter and the dark, troubling bits in life seem to shrink against the brightness of gratitude.
People comment from time to time on how 'thankful' I am and how much effort I put into appreciation and to tell you the truth, I am not a naturally thankful person. I have worked very hard to notice people and the things they do. I practice being appreciative with Mr. Awesome and with the kids. I make a conscious effort to tell people that I see them and appreciate what they do.
I started this for two reasons. When I was in high school I started volunteering on a team at church. The team leader was one of my mom's friends, someone I had known for years. It wasn't until I started working with her on a weekly basis that I noticed how often she said thank you and even more than that, how much she showed her appreciation for her team by respecting their time, ideas and talents. I also noticed that the people on her team were willing to work harder, stay later and were generally happier than most other teams volunteering there. I started studying her, learning from how she interacted with people and even now, years later, I often asked myself, 'What would Becky do?' when I'm puzzled by an interpersonal dilemma.
The second reason for my practice of appreciation comes from a lesson hard learned. Several yeas ago my friend's mother became very ill. This friend and I weren't super close but we had attended school and youth group together for several years and I had known her parents as very active members of our church community. I was always impressed by how giving and accepting her parents were and how much they loved each other, they were real partners in everything. I learned a lot from observing them over the years and I had always felt very grateful that they were part of the village that raised me.
When Mrs. W's health began to deteriorate, I really wanted to visit her or write her a note or something to tell her how much I appreciated and admired the way she lived her life. I wanted her to know that she made a difference to me ... but I didn't. I didn't want to intrude or force my way into her family's last weeks with her so I didn't say anything and she passed. She lived a full and marvelous life and was treasured by many, many people and I know she knew that, I just wish I had told her what she meant to me.
From Becky and Mrs. W I learned that you can motivate people through being appreciative and part of living with no regrets is telling the impressive people in your life just how impressive they are, every chance you get. The other thing that I have discovered along the way is that being appreciative, genuinely thankful for those people who make your life spectacular, is a gift to yourself. Noticing the good things in your life is like turning on the sunshine, everything is brighter and lighter and sweeter and the dark, troubling bits in life seem to shrink against the brightness of gratitude.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Mischief's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
One of Mischief's favourite books is Alexander's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. While the story is funny Mischief often reminds me at the end of the book that it is no fun having a bad day and he should know because yesterday was a doozie!
From the moment Mischief woke up, he made one bad decision followed by another which all piled up into a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Its Spirit Week at the school and yesterday was beach day. He had planned to wear his brown and orange board shorts with his surfing shirt but when he put them on before breakfast we realized that he had grown more than we thought over the winter. The shorts were micro short and dangerously tight and the shirt, aside from having a horrendously scratchy tag and feeling like 'too slippery' was also so small that the hem of the short wasn't even neighbor to the top of the shorts.
During breakfast Mischief got distracted by a scab on his knee which meant his cereal marinated in the milk for too long and became soggy but there was no more of his favourite cereal so he was 'forced' to eat what was in his bowl. After breakfast he realised that he forgot his lunch kit at school so he had to carry his lunch to school in a bread bag and drink water from the fountain because his juice bottle was also at school.
When he put on his boots he realized that the mitts he shoved in them after school the day before had made the liners wet and cold but he had to wear them anyway because the only rain boots we could find were pink and there was NO WAY he could handle wearing the pink boots after the morning he had had. He decided that it ha been a tough morning and he needed his lucky Yoda hat to make it through the rest of the day but it was no where to be seen. Eventually we found it under the couch and we got everyone to school just in time. As he jumped out of the van Mischief said, "well, at least there's swimming today!"
"Swimming? At school?" I asked
"Yep, its beach day and we're swimming!" he beamed.
"Buddy, I'm pretty sure there won't be any swimming at school today. Its pretend beach day, its way too cold to swim outside still."
"Aww, dang it!" with that he slammed the van door and trudged up the walk way.
I didn't see him again until after school. When the bell rang, I was in the school office and I could hear him in the hallway talking to the Kindergarten teacher and I could tell he was still in a funk. When he saw me he pulled his hat over his eyes and mumbled something to do with 'stupid hat' and 'still a bad day' and turned to walk out of the school.
After talking with him and having some more details filled in by his teacher I understood why hiding seemed like the best and only option for him. Turns out his day was a series of bad decisions. He was inattentive, very physical and kind of hyper and worst of all he sucker punched another student, someone whom he actually likes very much.
As we walked into the house, with his Yoda hat still pulled low over his eyes, he informed me hat he was going to his room because he was grounded for 17 years.
"Why are you grounded?" I asked.
"Because my brain is telling me all sorts of bad things and we shouldn't be with people or get to do anything fun."
"Why 17 years?"
"Cause in 17 years I'll be old, like thirty or something (okay math is not his strong suit right now) and I'll be the boss of my brain instead of the other way around. I did lots of ba decisions today but mostly I can't believe I hit Casey! Arg!" He pulled his hat all the way over his face, slumped to the floor and started to cry.
I picked my little buddy up and carried him to my room. He cried for several minutes, then he calmed down and lectured me about how he need to make better choices and how if he slows down he can see the right thing to do. When he felt he had lectured himself long enough he pulled the blanket up under his chin, curled up against me and turned on the TV. We cuddled for almost an hour, watching Ellen and laughing.
The authoritative side of me felt like I should be doing more to correct his behaviour but seriously, how do you discipline a kid who grounds and lectures himself? And besides, everyone has a bad day every now and then, even when they have Yoda and The Force on their side. I decided not t say anything more and just enjoy the cuddles. When Mr. Awesome came home and found us snuggled up in bed, he asked, "what's up?"
"Just getting over a bad day," I said.
"Sounds like a plan," He said and slid into bed with us.
Maybe the whole day wasn't so bad afterall.
From the moment Mischief woke up, he made one bad decision followed by another which all piled up into a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Its Spirit Week at the school and yesterday was beach day. He had planned to wear his brown and orange board shorts with his surfing shirt but when he put them on before breakfast we realized that he had grown more than we thought over the winter. The shorts were micro short and dangerously tight and the shirt, aside from having a horrendously scratchy tag and feeling like 'too slippery' was also so small that the hem of the short wasn't even neighbor to the top of the shorts.
During breakfast Mischief got distracted by a scab on his knee which meant his cereal marinated in the milk for too long and became soggy but there was no more of his favourite cereal so he was 'forced' to eat what was in his bowl. After breakfast he realised that he forgot his lunch kit at school so he had to carry his lunch to school in a bread bag and drink water from the fountain because his juice bottle was also at school.
When he put on his boots he realized that the mitts he shoved in them after school the day before had made the liners wet and cold but he had to wear them anyway because the only rain boots we could find were pink and there was NO WAY he could handle wearing the pink boots after the morning he had had. He decided that it ha been a tough morning and he needed his lucky Yoda hat to make it through the rest of the day but it was no where to be seen. Eventually we found it under the couch and we got everyone to school just in time. As he jumped out of the van Mischief said, "well, at least there's swimming today!"
"Swimming? At school?" I asked
"Yep, its beach day and we're swimming!" he beamed.
"Buddy, I'm pretty sure there won't be any swimming at school today. Its pretend beach day, its way too cold to swim outside still."
"Aww, dang it!" with that he slammed the van door and trudged up the walk way.
I didn't see him again until after school. When the bell rang, I was in the school office and I could hear him in the hallway talking to the Kindergarten teacher and I could tell he was still in a funk. When he saw me he pulled his hat over his eyes and mumbled something to do with 'stupid hat' and 'still a bad day' and turned to walk out of the school.
After talking with him and having some more details filled in by his teacher I understood why hiding seemed like the best and only option for him. Turns out his day was a series of bad decisions. He was inattentive, very physical and kind of hyper and worst of all he sucker punched another student, someone whom he actually likes very much.
As we walked into the house, with his Yoda hat still pulled low over his eyes, he informed me hat he was going to his room because he was grounded for 17 years.
"Why are you grounded?" I asked.
"Because my brain is telling me all sorts of bad things and we shouldn't be with people or get to do anything fun."
"Why 17 years?"
"Cause in 17 years I'll be old, like thirty or something (okay math is not his strong suit right now) and I'll be the boss of my brain instead of the other way around. I did lots of ba decisions today but mostly I can't believe I hit Casey! Arg!" He pulled his hat all the way over his face, slumped to the floor and started to cry.
I picked my little buddy up and carried him to my room. He cried for several minutes, then he calmed down and lectured me about how he need to make better choices and how if he slows down he can see the right thing to do. When he felt he had lectured himself long enough he pulled the blanket up under his chin, curled up against me and turned on the TV. We cuddled for almost an hour, watching Ellen and laughing.
The authoritative side of me felt like I should be doing more to correct his behaviour but seriously, how do you discipline a kid who grounds and lectures himself? And besides, everyone has a bad day every now and then, even when they have Yoda and The Force on their side. I decided not t say anything more and just enjoy the cuddles. When Mr. Awesome came home and found us snuggled up in bed, he asked, "what's up?"
"Just getting over a bad day," I said.
"Sounds like a plan," He said and slid into bed with us.
Maybe the whole day wasn't so bad afterall.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Is it Contagious?
I had a hilarious conversation the other day with a wonderful teacher at Dude's school. She is part of the Resource team and a mother of a son on the Autism Spectrum. Her sense of humour, empathy and down to earth approach to dealing with kids, all kids, is so refreshing that I often feel a little tipsy after talking with her. Yes, I think I get a little buzz on from her honesty, optimism and joy. Anyway, the other day she was telling me about her two sons and how the younger one jokes that they are all catching Autism from her older son and I knew exactly what she meant!
There are dozens of things we do everyday that are different than most families. Most of these adjustments began because we realized that its just easier to change how we do things than to watch Dude struggle though his day. I'm not talking major adaptations, just minor tweaks to our routine because although the boy is going to have to learn how to function in neurotypical world there's nothing that says he can't move through life in his own way.
On the surface, people on The Spectrum can appear quirky at best and downright weird at worst. They have their own rhythm to life and do even the most ordinary of tasks in a manner that would never even occur to a neurotypical person to try. Sadly, many times us 'normal' folk try to change these quirky habits so that the person with ASD can fit in. We think we are correcting their behaviour, doing them a favour but most of the time we're not. Making them behave just like everyone else for no other reason than it makes us feel more comfortable is selfish and wrong.
If you talk to a person on The Spectrum and find out the reasoning behind the habit, their way of doing things usually makes perfect sense and is often times much more logical than the norm. I have to tell you that after living with someone on The Autism Spectrum for more than ten years I have to say that I think ASD logic may not be that quirky or weird afterall.
There are tons of times that after a conversation with Dude, I'm not sure which one of us is normal, really. He can explain in detail, and quite persuasively, his point of view. He can give us the why and the how behind his every decision whereas most of us do the things we do, the way we do, because that's the way it's always been done. We couldn't explain our way out of a wet paper bag but we're sure we're right because we're the 'normal' ones.
So let me ask again, who is the neurologically challenged one? The kid who can tell you why he thinks the way he does, or the hordes of us who mindlessly move through our daily routines?
The point is, I kind of hope ASD logic is contagious because I think it is a gift to move through life knowing, with absolute certainty, why you do what you do.
I see people with Asperger's Syndrome as a bright thread in the rich tapestry of life.
~Tony Attwood
There are dozens of things we do everyday that are different than most families. Most of these adjustments began because we realized that its just easier to change how we do things than to watch Dude struggle though his day. I'm not talking major adaptations, just minor tweaks to our routine because although the boy is going to have to learn how to function in neurotypical world there's nothing that says he can't move through life in his own way.
On the surface, people on The Spectrum can appear quirky at best and downright weird at worst. They have their own rhythm to life and do even the most ordinary of tasks in a manner that would never even occur to a neurotypical person to try. Sadly, many times us 'normal' folk try to change these quirky habits so that the person with ASD can fit in. We think we are correcting their behaviour, doing them a favour but most of the time we're not. Making them behave just like everyone else for no other reason than it makes us feel more comfortable is selfish and wrong.
If you talk to a person on The Spectrum and find out the reasoning behind the habit, their way of doing things usually makes perfect sense and is often times much more logical than the norm. I have to tell you that after living with someone on The Autism Spectrum for more than ten years I have to say that I think ASD logic may not be that quirky or weird afterall.
There are tons of times that after a conversation with Dude, I'm not sure which one of us is normal, really. He can explain in detail, and quite persuasively, his point of view. He can give us the why and the how behind his every decision whereas most of us do the things we do, the way we do, because that's the way it's always been done. We couldn't explain our way out of a wet paper bag but we're sure we're right because we're the 'normal' ones.
So let me ask again, who is the neurologically challenged one? The kid who can tell you why he thinks the way he does, or the hordes of us who mindlessly move through our daily routines?
The point is, I kind of hope ASD logic is contagious because I think it is a gift to move through life knowing, with absolute certainty, why you do what you do.
I see people with Asperger's Syndrome as a bright thread in the rich tapestry of life.
~Tony Attwood
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